I ain’t changing!

Why do people yearn to change other people? Every darned day someone I barely know pops up advising me to change this and that to adjust better with the blasted changing world, where “change is the only constant” (yes, yes, excuse me while I yawn!). If I try to point out that...umm...I have not been doing too badly in my current form, I am told sagely that I have been lucky but that it might not last and should "learn to compromise" - after all, we have to live in this world! Yeah, big deal. As if we have a choice.

You see, I am not too sure if changing a person is actually a good thing. Because no matter how much you tweak the exterior, most people will inherently remain the same. They will only tend to mask things that make others uncomfortable. Now, kick me if I sound silly, but I would rather be around someone who curses me to my face rather than does so behind my back. Good old Julius Caesar would not have had as big a shock when Brutus beaned him with a knife if he had known that his beloved Brute thought that he was a danger to Rome and would be eminently improved by Death. (and sure, he is an honourable man, and all that kind of rot!)

I have tried tinkering with my behaviour a bit (generally broadcasting it loud and clear over my blogs) but frankly what it boils down to is – am I comfortable with it? The answer, as I get older, seems increasingly to be in the negative. This does not mean I want a licence to misbehave or act like a jerk. One does have to observe certain rules of decorum, but heck, there is a thing as going too far. Yes, I will dress formally if that be the dress code. Yes, I will attempt not to shout in public because it disturbs people. But I am deuced if I am going to sit and grin at some rectum-faced excreta in human shape and tell him he is a genius or write a bunch a lies just because the some fool has paid one of my editors a sackful of dollars for an ad.

What it boils down to is - I would rather be unpopular with others than with myself! Hey, I am only get to spend some time with other people, but I am stuck with me until I kick the bucket. I can quite sympathise with what Dorothy Parker meant when she wrote:

If I don't drive around the park,
I'm sure to make my mark.
If I'm in bed each night by ten,
I may get back my looks again.
If I abstain from fun and such,
I'll probably amount to much;
But I shall stay the way I am,
Because I do not give a damn.

Or when she said:

In youth, it was a way I had
To do my best to please,
And change, with every passing lad,
To suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know,
And I do the things I do;
And if you do not like me so,
To hell, my love, with you!

Quite!